The Lie of Hookup Culture: Why Casual Sex Isn’t the Power Move You Think It Is

Hookups are the lowest connection standard, but we’ve glamorized them like it’s a power.

In today’s dating culture, we’re fed the illusion that emotional detachment is the goal.
That having sex without catching feelings is a flex.
That being “unbothered” is evolved.

But let’s be honest…

When did emotional numbness become a sign of strength?

We’ve mistaken guardedness for empowerment.
We’ve celebrated withdrawal like it’s wisdom.
But at its core, hookup culture is the equivalent of fast food of intimacy:
Quick. Addictive. Empty.

If you only feel wanted through a digital screen or a stranger in your bed...
That’s not freedom.
That’s settling for less than you deserve.

You weren’t made to tolerate superficial junk treatment.
You were made for depth, amazement, excitement, and awe.

High-value men and women don’t settle for shallow.

They don’t lower their desires to be liked.
They don’t abandon their hearts to feel accepted.
And they damn sure don’t confuse sexual availability with relational power.

If you’ve ever felt the hollowness after yet another night of disconnection…
It’s not because you’re “too sensitive.”
It’s because your soul knows you were built for something more sacred.

Raise Your Standard

You don’t need to play small to be desired.
The most courageous thing you can do is ask for more, from your chest.

So here’s your challenge:

What’s the most courageous thing you’ve ever asked for in love or connection?
Send me a message or DM me on social media — I want to hear your truth.

Let’s make depth the new standard.

-Elian Vale